Here are some tips on how to make sex last longer if pacing, in general, tends to be something you struggle with. That said, in the event that you hit a snag during dirty talk, remember that sexy time doesnβt necessarily need to stall out unless someone becomes really uncomfortable. Lastly, what talking dirty to your guy does is build sexual tension and help him with sexual arousal. Sexual tension is crucial if you want to prevent your relationship from getting boring.
Any man wants to know that he has the power to satisfy you like no one else. He wants to be able to give you pleasure and make you feel amazing. In fact, Iβve heard many of my male clients say that simply witnessing their partner in the depths of pleasure is more satisfying to them than experiencing their own deepest pleasure.
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If youβre anything like me, auditory arousal will help you stay grounded in the moment during lovemaking. You and your husband deserve an experience where both of you are fully present so that you can lose yourselves in the passion and pleasure of the moment. Another exercise is to go through a vocabulary list of body parts, slang, and sexual acts commonly used. Rate them as a possible turn on, a (5), to an absolute turn off, a (1), so you are both clear as to what you like. You can practice these phrases in the practice that Dr. Kaufman recommends above.
If your girlfriend or wife tells you that she likes the idea of talking dirty, thatβs great news! After all, now you can actually blurt out those perverse thoughts that run through your mind when youβre banging your woman, and turn her on at the same time. Make sure that derogatory words like βslutβ or βcuntβ are only used if your partner agrees to them. Cause they might end up as an insult, with a total buzzkill and hurtful feelings even though you didnβt mean it that way. The best way of figuring that out is to talk about dirty words you donβt want to use (not while youβre having sex, but at random, neutral moments during your day). When talking dirty, you can include swear or slang words in your phrases.
It takes women far longer to get aroused than men, and that’s why they don’t orgasm as quickly as men do. Unless you’re dating a psychic, you’re partner can’t read your mind. When you vocalize what feels good, what needs some work, or that your clitoris is just a little bit higher, and you’d really love it if your partner could focus all their energy there, then you both benefit.
βDirty talk can reveal fantasy material, which brings in the erotic imagination for both partners,β says Buehler. βSharing this material can increase not only arousal, but intimacy and closeness as they learn more about each otherβs sexual wants and needs,β she explains. But if the timing does feel right, dirty talk is a great way to increase both your emotional and physical connection. In fact, erotic talk can boost sex drive and arousal, per a Womenβs Health UK report.